Meet the Characters

  • Joel, aka “Yoel” (the narrator)

    A 24-year old Chicago native in a jungle of Israeli teens. Conceived: Florence, Italy, March 1973, after his parents spend the day at a winery. Joined the Israeli Army against the wishes of his father, though he harbors the secret hope that doing so will make his dad proud. Smitten by his Israeli girlfriend, a Yemenite-Persian beauty who at once reinforces and challenges everything he’s ever thought about Israelis. Enjoys the camaraderie of training, but deathly afraid of combat.

  • Tanenbaum

    A smiley Persian with light brown skin and an easy laugh. Prone to misplacing his boots.

  • Tomer

    A scrawny Tom Sawyer-type with wire-framed eyeglasses and a warm smile. Madly in love with his girlfriend back home, Tali.

  • Dror Boy Genius

    A clean-cut Ashkenazi kid with dark hair and the lean, angular face of an Austrian skier. One of three in Platoon Two to score above 99 on his A-levels, he is that rare breed of genius who’s both wicked smart and socially affable, equally adept at discussing String Theory and Animal House.

  • Ayal

    A lanky, dark-skinned geek with thick eyeglasses and asthma. Sings constantly.

  • Gerber

    A hyperactive motor mouth with a shaved head and the face of a pit bull. Like a boxer, he’s constantly darting, jabbing—except instead of throwing punches, he pummels away with one-liners and insults that sock you in the gut. Hilarious, but like sugar, too much Gerber makes you sick.

  • Tim Bailey

    A cocksure, 23-year-old Syracuse native with a black beard and blue veins that run through his biceps like rivers. On his sixteenth birthday, he found out he was a Jew.

  • Ronen Peretz

    A chunky Sephardic kid from Tel Aviv. Still looking for his kitbag, which he lost on the first day of boot camp.

  • Alon, aka, The Draft Dodger

    A punky-looking 20-year-old with an eyebrow ring and black fingernail polish. On his first trip to the military induction center, he brought along a dove.

  • Dorit, aka, The Girlfriend

    A Mediterranean princess with dark skin and almond eyes. As feisty as she is beautiful, she’s a former drill sergeant in the Israeli Army.


  • Captain Pinchas Fluman